I never really thought much about motherhood. I always wanted to be a wife. However now that i am a wife, i cannot help but think about the next steps in our lives, which is approaching mommyhood.
I have a few mommies in my immediate circle of friends and i am the godmother (GM they will call me one day) for both children which is fantastic. Both children are beyond cute. I am looking forward to joining my mommy-friends in the future. However now i am wondering if i have waited too long?
Being part of the blogging world has definitely introduced me to a whole array of mommies. The majority of mommies i have come across are mostly young moms. There are some mommies under twenty-five with like four children! I know there are many factors that make this the case for every mom. However coming across some of these blogs has me wondering did i wait too long to join the mommy-club?
Being a mom in your twenties is definitely different from being a mom in your thirties. Energy level alone is a factor. And of course there are more health related risks to having children in your thirties. And since i tend to worry about things i have no reason worrying about--i worry about these factors. I am aware it is never easy to conceive and or be a mommy whether in your 20s, 30s and or 40s. Being a mommy is a blessing and all of our blessings come when we are ready (in the hands of God).
I know God does not reveal the plans for our lives. He knows if we did, we would protest too much. I wonder if i waited too long to reach mommyhood but then i think about how many things in our lives are beyond our control. God plans our lives according to his will for our lives. And truth be told my hope of becoming a wife definitely fit into His plans for life which is awesome. Therefore, i am hopeful that God will enfold mommyhood for Team Pancakes.
I am taking this time before mommyhood to be the best wife ever hence best mommy ever! Become debt-free, save6-month emergency fund, get a downpayment in order to buy a house. I also need to work on my fitness, relationship with God, being a giving daughter, sister, godommy (GM) and overall well rounded person.
23 comments:
I'm a young wife at 22 (been married two years) and even I wonder about mommy hood. I have friends that have two and even three children and now that my husband and I are married and we have a wonderful little puppy -- I cant help but wonder about the next steps.
However, I'm doing my best to savor this time. I'm focusing on strengthening my relationship with my husband and establishing myself a little more.
I think you'll be a great mom, you have a great heart. God will bless you and your husband in his perfect timing. Sometimes its good to let him plan things :)
Holy cow - I think we all want to have all those things BEFORE we become parents but most of us soon realize life is too short to meet all those goals before then...because life happens..you'll know when the time is right. You'll just know.
I read an interview with Halle Berry last year. And she said something that made me think. She said she feels the only mistake she think God made is making it hard for women to get pregnant as they age and making it too easy for women to get pregnant at a young age.
I don't know if God makes mistakes but Ms. Halle can have her views!
I'm glad my blog title makes you smile, you're a sweetie!
Mommyhood is a great thing and I always envisioned being married before I had kids. Life happened and not in the order I had planned! I had my first daughter at 25, then my second at almost 27. I felt at that time I was ready. There's never a perfect time in all honesty. The great thing is that you have a husband for support. Hearing my girls tell me they love me and that they are proud of me, I wouldn't change a thing about the circumstances of their arrivals.
Sounds like you're on the right track! Babies are obviously good at any time, but it's always good to have your ducks in a row. I'm approaching 30 myself, so I've definitely had a case of baby fever from time to time. But when it's the right time, it'll happen. ;)
I don't think you waited too long. There are all kinds of advancements in technology that can help women get pregnant. I would look into getting some fertility testing if you're really worried. That way when you're ready to take that step you'll know what you're up against.
It's great that you have a plan though. Just trust God to continue to guide you in the right direction. BTW I have a new giveaway up on my blog http://yummommy.blogspot.com/2011/06/mealtime-with-country-bobs.html
All in God's timing...I am grateful to have been a young mom. I was 24 and 27 when our sons were born.
I think your goals before having a child are admirable. Just leave room for God to work instead of trying to plan it all out. Becoming a mother changed me into a more well rounded person and I am grateful for how each child shaped and molded my character.
joy & blessings to you,
Alida
Hi Mrs, Pancakes! Love the name. :)
Thanks for dropping by my page! Love your blog!
Don't worry, you will know when you're ready to be a mommy. Enjoy your time as a wife and do things together now that might be harder to do when you have kids. Good luck on your savings! My gosh I wish to be debt-free....lol.
xoyeanxo
Cool post! :)
ciao ciao from Rome
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Sometimes I think the teen mom's got it right because by the time they are 30 their kid will be close to 18!! But that is totally ridiculous b/c teens are too young to have babies. I never wanted to be an old mom. I feel like 35 is my limit. I don't want to have kids past that. I think it totally makes sense that you aren't rushing into this though. Some people do and while it may work out in the end there is something to be said for planning and being in the best position possible.
Definitely take your time and enjoy being married first. Once the kiddos are in the picture, things become a little more hectic and focus is of course placed on them. Not to say you can't balance it (my hubby and I do - date nights are a MUST and time alone without kids or spouses is another key) but having the time spent pleasantly as a newlywed couple is priceless. My husband and I never did have that time since I had two children from a previous marriage before we got married and now we have two more of our own.
There is plenty of time for kids (and yes there are pros/cons to younger vs. older) but you have to do what's right for you and your family. :)
Good luck! :)
lol you should come hang out with my friends - you definitely won't feel too late!
My college colleagues married around age 30 and my closest friends are single with no intention of procreating in the near future. My friends who are a little younger (around 25) aren't even dating and the late 20's kids can't imagine getting married anytime soon. I'm the only one even living with my boyfriend.
I wonder if it has to do with finances - the people I list all live in NYC, SF, Boston, LA and other somewhat expensive cities :P
I'll be 30 when my son is born. I honestly was not ready to be a mom when I was in my twenties! You'll figure out what age is right for you!
have been looking for a blog similar to mine! so new follower. love to hear about other couples' adventures as they start their life together. :) we JUST signed papers for a house, so when you mentioned saving up for a down payment, thought I would leave a little note. good luck!
I was 23 with my first and I'll be 32 with my second. 35 is my cut off for baby making, for some of the reasons you mention.
You sound like you have your priorities in order and will make a good mom when you're ready. Everything does happen in God's time, but ultimately the decision is yours and the Mr's on when to start trying.
Me and mine live in a townhouse right now and I always said I wanted our house before I had baby #2, but that went out the window because we just didn't want to wait that long (it could take years for us). I'm sure God will bless whatever decisions you all make.
It's good that you are thinking about motherhood! Although there is no perfect time to start having kids, you will know when you are ready. Me and my hubs waited while we built our careers, earned graduate degrees, traveled and was debt-free. It took 8 years...I was 33 when my daughter was born. I used to say 35 was my max age, but I just turned 35 and we have yet to plan #2.
You and Mr Pancakes enjoy each other for the time being!
I married at 20 but we decided to wait at least 5 years before we had kids. Best choice ever. Let us really get to know each other. Now we're old married people with kid out of the house.
I am so excited about everyone's experiences on motherhood! im excited:-)
New follower from the hop. Hope you can hop by www.girltechdivas.com and follow back.
Getting pregnant the first time was a little difficult for me....at 25. The second one was a lot easier. :o) Don't listen to anyone and what they say...I have tons of 40 year old mama friends who have little ones. God does know the time! Good luck!
stopping by on the blog hop!
http://captainfussybuckets.blogspot.com
God's time is the BEST! As you wrote God has a plan for our life and we have to be patient and wait for it to happen.
Age is just a number and in fron of God is nothing so you haven't left anything late. Just look after your health and everything will happen when the time is ripe.
Following you from the Mom Mart Social Media Monday Hop! Come by and follow me too! Http://MomMart.blogspot.com
If it is in God's plans it will happen. You will become a mommy when you are ready. I am a 29 year old mommy of two under two. I have a relative in her late 40's that just had her first baby. Age is relative.
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