Thursday, January 19, 2012

52 Weeks of Love: Sam & Bennett

Can i just tell you all how much i am learning from the series!
 All your experiences and words of wisdom are just so invaluable!  
Today i have Sam and Bennett, who are like the cutest couple you would ever meet.  
And if i could meet Sam in person, i would definitely go to her spin class, go check out her blog after you finish reading your find out what i mean.  
The lady is so inspiring when it comes to how she lives out Fitness, Food & Faith.
Take it away, Sam!


Hello Team Pancakes fans!  
 I am thrilled to be talking today about my own marriage as a part of Mrs. P’s series. 

I married my wonderful husband, Bennett, on August 6, 2010.  I came into marriage a little nervous about the first year.  We have several friends who have had very rough starts to their marriages, and although I was so excited to be marrying Bennett, I prepared myself for a lot of hard conversations and situations to pop up those first 365 days. 

Amazingly, the transition from single life to married life was incredibly smooth, easy and full of joy.  We read as many books as we could during engagement about being newlyweds and tried to fit in quite a few counseling sessions to really establish a good base.  I would highly recommend pre-marital counseling to any engaged couples out there – 
it is definitely worth your time and money. 

During the first year, the most important things I learned about marriage were:

Set expectations high and be demanding of your marriage

Always be gentle and make your marriage a place of peace

Take time to pray together daily, even if you don’t feel like it

Let your husband be a man – celebrate those gender differences

Marriage is not about your own happiness but about the revelation of God’s glory

Believe in your husband’s goodwill towards you – show grace when your patience runs out

Ask how your husband would feel most loved and tell him what he can do to show you love

Strive to establish a deep friendship and become intimately familiar with each other’s worlds

We definitely don’t have a perfect marriage and find ourselves frustrated at times, but thinking about all the reasons I love Bennett and how our marriage is truly the greatest gift from God helps me keep a positive and grateful attitude.  I feel very blessed to be sharing life with a man who loves Jesus, loves his family, loves me, and is committed to praying for our marriage and doing what he can to improve it daily. 

Thanks, Mrs. Pancakes, for including me! 


Thank you Sam and Bennett, marriage is truly the greatest gift from God.  
And the list you've learned definitely warms my heart!
It's a list we should all strive to remember to live by to strengthen our marriages regardless of how long we've been married!

Question of the Day:
Did you and the hubby complete pre-marital counselling?
Did you find it helpful/useful?
Would you consider pre-marital counselling if you are about to get married?


~Style Bot~ said...

How adorable are they? I've noticed every female Sam I met is down to earth and very likeable. No exception here! Now, for your questions...the hubby and I did not have pre-marital counseling. We didn't really have a long engagement and actually when we got married it was more of a "we have our marriage license, the court closes at 5pm let's just do it today" kind of thing, LOL! He was deploying soon and wanted to be betroved before he left the country. However, I definitely BELIEVE in counseling. I think if we were to experience issues that we are unable to reach common ground on and they are causing friction I would absolutely subscribe to counseling. We haven't experienced anything like that yet but I do not operate under the illusion that we are different than any other couple and I am sure it is coming. It hasn't happened in the 10 years we've been together or the 7 we've been married, but I definitely rest assured it is coming.

With Class & Sass,

Krysten @ Why Girls Are Weird said...

I didn't go through pre-marital counseling during my first marriage and I don't think I will during my second if it ever happens.

Marilyn said...

They are SUPER adorable... Very lovely couple.. LOVE their story : ))

Heather said...

What a cute couple! We did a pre-marital session through the Catholic Church, and it was definitely helpful, though I would have preferred a session more focused on "us" than the faith-based matters that were discussed, especially since I am not personally religious. I'd love to do a "retreat" or something of that nature for married couples in the future.

Carlie said...

They are a cute couple, and she had some great advice!

Faith said...

oooh i love this! great post!

we also had pre-marital counseling and i highly recommend it. you just learn some things about each other that you didn't know because you didn't think to ask the question.

i am just loving this series, Mrs. Pancakes!

Alida said...

What a sweet couple!

We did go through some pre-marital stuff and even took some tests to see how compatible we are. We were actually told that we were not compatible and that we probably should not get married. But 30 years later here we are!!!

Lauryn said...

This is a beautiful post by a very smart, down-to-earth couple. Great advice for engaged couples to follow!

♥AdamAlexMommy♥ said...

such a beautiful couple.

Ms. Geek Goddess said...

Awwww, Love this! They are so cute! :)

Quiana said...

Yes, premarital counseling is fantastic for laying a successful foundation to a marriage. We did a 10 week course of Saving Your Marriage Before it Starts via our church and it was great. Although we had known each other for 10 years by the time we got married, this course was invaluable.

Rocker Chic said...

Awww what a beautiful couple I love this series even though I am not married.

Although I can only answer one the question.(since I am not married) I do plan on pre counseling before marriage.

Mr. Taylor and his Lady said...

so perfect! oh my gosh, seriously, could their wedding picture be any cuter?! ADORE!
xo TJ

Megan said...

I totally adore Sam!! She's def one of my faves!! Such great lessons on marriage!

Dana said...

Cute couple. We did per-marital counseling. We found it to be beneficial. It was kinda fun to listening to each others responses.

Alicia@ Mommy Delicious said...

I LOVE this: "Get rid of anything in your life today that is not in line with your dreams for tomorrow." WHEW... that speak volumes and I needed to read that today. Whew... I'm getting shivers over here thinking about it!

Kate @ Daffodils said...

Yay, I found the comments :) THanks for the help! What a sweet couple, I love this series (let me know if you ever need a contributor ;)

We did the Catholic Church pre-marital counseling and found it useful. It was a big survery we filled out separately, then discussed the answers together. It helped us affirm what we had in common and gave us some issues to straighten out before we got married. I would definitely recommend it!


Marriage is not about your own happiness but about the revelation of God’s glory. Now that is what I call putting everything in perspective. I've tagged you in my last post. Come on by and check out the rules.

Lisa x

Sundresses and Smiles said...

Great tips!! I especially like the point about asking your husband (or wife) how they can feel most loved and telling them what would make you feel most loved! Sam was also a beautiful bride!

Amy said...

OMG what a small world. I went to med school with Bennett!

Mrs. Pancakes said...

@ Amy...small world indeed! aren't they an awesome couple!

Sam {} said...

thanks again so much for having me!!! loved being a part of this great series :)